3 basic fears - losing safety, loneliness n unworthiness

during yesterdae session with joyful garden sangha,
dharma discussion was about dealing with loneliness...
n i shared how i practiced (at least try to practice) with those undesired feelings of loneliness, mixed with other fears like losin safety net n unworthiness
(during a painful period when i broke up with my ex)

the inspiration that helped mi thru that "dark period" of my life
was from ezra bayda's teachings...
so here's an article by him that focus on jus this - practicing with our fears
i hope u will find it as inspiring as i did
breathing in... out... smile =)

http://www.zencentersandiego.org/global/File/articles/tricycle2009spring_fear.pdf

japanese garden wow

todae did some informal walkin meditation @ japanese garden w the joyful garden sangha...
breathing in... breathing out...
just looking at the trees, greenery, lake n open space
wow...
speechless...
the garden is beautiful, has such a nice calmness, serene n peaceful feel to it =)
never knew japanese garden is like this haha =P
its nice that s'pore still has spots like this
offering that little bit of nature amidst the concrete jungle
bet i will be back to do more walking in the garden haha =)
mmm...
shd do more walks ard the scenic/nature spots ard our little island =)

mindfulness bell on laptop - it works! =)

installed the mindfulness bell on my laptop yesterdae...
it works!

busi workin on laptop... type type
mindfulness bell... ding...
bow... 3 mindful breaths... breathin in breathin out =)
refreshing...

surfing net...
ding...
bow... 3 mindful breaths... residin in physical sensations...
feeling grounded...

playing game...
ding...
bow... 3 mindfuln breaths... woke up from e game...
wonderful =)

http://www.mindfulnessdc.org/index.html#clock

past present future

time flies again haha
now back in s'pore...
the whole overseas depolyment of 4 mths is over...
where is it?
where is my seasickness?
where are all the sleepless nite shifts?
there are onli memory traces left...
fragmentary n incomplete...

brings to mind a saying from diamond sutra

the mind of the past is ungraspable
the mind of the future is ungraspable
the mind of the present is ungraspable

what is time?
is time real?
what is real?

when i was overseas i missed s'pore so much
now that i am back after a initial excitement
its back to old routine...
where has all the feelings gone to?

typing this entry into my blog on a lazy weekend...
yawnn... feeling a little tired...
maybe time for a nap?

zzz...