yesterdae after work,
managed to squeeze time n showed up at yesterdae's dharma circle at NUS,
partly was intrigued by the topic - finding ur direction in life...
i think e Dharma Frens did a great job and i am sure many of us walked away with helpful insights n questions to further probe ourselves along finding the direction in our life...
thank u all =)
but i did think that maybe to make it even more useful is to link it more to our practice life...
i think i didn't share clearly my thoughts on this topic during the session,
maybe mind was too scattered haha
after a sitting later, with mind bit more calm n collected, feel that maybe it is beneficial to share using this forum...
i discussed during the dharma circle that i think of direction in life in terms of both "outer layer" and "inner layer".
outer layer is finding direction from forms e.g. career, money, fame, achievements, luxuries etc
inner layer is finding direction thru spiritual practice
outer layer direction may change over time, direction of our career, studies, volunteer work, marriage, family, etc.
outer layer is always about looking outside, guided by our wants and needs, on the level of the form and personal self "i my me", which ultimately is self-centered...
to think that we can find happiness on this level, well, it is possible but is that ALL?
maybe driven by our innermost desire to understand the meaning of life, or maybe a nagging doubt of "What am i?", or maybe jus a little taste of dukkha, or maybe a sudden realisation that we are caught up in a rat race that is ultimately meaningless, sets us seeking more than the outer direction mentioned above...
then we begin look inside, within ourselves, to try to find direction in life on a "inner layer", trying to find direction out of the messiness of our everyday life thru spiritual efforts - the path to awakening, the practice life...
slowly we begin on the path of breaking identification with our self-centered thinking, observing of our mind and building the willingness to be present and living a more genuine life grounded in increasing awareness n presence...
we may begin to realise that the practice life - perhaps consisting of formal and/or informal methods of meditation, is realli the onli way to a more genuine and fulfilling life... as the process slowly open up our heart and mind, as we slowly develop wisdom n compassion bit by bit...
we may begin to see the outer layer from a different perspective...
before, we may be very serious and uptight about the outer direction in our life,
we may think that we muz have this or that to be happy, we muz do this or that to be successful, we muz attain this and that to be okie...
but slowly we may begin to realise the outer layer is not that ALL important as we previously felt to be after all...
i am not suggesting giving up our outer layer direction of life, as we definitely need something at the outer layer for bread and butter reasons, and that it is also often meaningful and/or fun to pursue some of the things at outer layer...
but rather i am talking about the ability to be able to see them with a certain light-heartedness (sometimes we can be so serious that we become scary isn't it =P), with loving kindness (sometimes we can be so harsh on ourselves isn't it =P) and know that whether we succeed or not is ultimately okie...
also we may begin to realise that our difficulties on the outer layer are not obstacles but they are the inner spiritual path itself. then outer layer and inner layer become one... our everyday living becomes our practice life, relating to both unreasonable bosses or subordinates becomes practice, managing e difficulties at work becomes practice, observing and dissolving vexations at work n at home becomes practice...
joy may then arise from the pursuit of our outer direction of life, in whatever it may be, a meaningful career, volunteer work, relationship...
in ways guided by cultivation at the inner layer,
the quiet kind of joy, ease and peace that is unfathomable to someone who is onli aware of the level of the outer layer...
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